i feel guilty for well, neglecting this site lately. i created this site to blog everyday, about my life. this is supposed to be private, and i know that only a few knows that i have this site. i did not intend to not blog about my life. well, the truth is, i have nothing to blog. i mean yes, i can blog whatever i want, but i want to blog interesting posts only. but i lacked inspiration in doing so, so please bear with me.

so, i bet this will going to be my welcome post for february. you know, the month of hearts & love. haha. so, you got a date this valentines? don't ask me. i don't. yet i'm happy. single is sexy, remember? so for those single ladies like me out there, be happy! what are you planning to do this valentines? me, i have no plans. i'll just stay at home and surf the net, all day. it's definitely boring, but what can i do? i can't wander at the malls, i'm sure i can do something better.

speaking of love, lemme blog a long & nonsense post of what i am feeling right now. lmao. okay, don't read if you don't care.

i'm a girl who tries to be happy, at all times. even when i'm at my hardest, i try to smile, even a bit. but sometimes i'm getting tired pretending to be okay. the truth is, i'm not. and i bet, it will take some time for me to be okay. i'm tired. i'm no robot, and i also get tired. my friends ask me why am i becoming passive these few days. i can't answer them for they only won't understand and i don't want my dull attitude to cause a heavy load for them.

i want to cry. now. i'm just trying to be the strongest that i can. you know, well.. i know that it's hard to get a heart broken. i admit that i'm not mature enough to experience those kinds of things, but i am experiencing it now.

no words can explain what i am feeling now. i can't describe it myself. sorry if i'm being nonsense in this post. haha. but i'm not imitating marlene aguilar, okay? it's much harder than you thought. promise.

( tagalog & harsh words ahead. xencia. di ko na ma-take. )

message to HIM. you know who fcuking btich you are. okay, see you in june, asshole. you bitch. magsisisi ka. @1!v24cv2

ayoko na. tama na to. apat na taon na akong naghihintay sa WALA. putang ina naman kasi. ang boba ko naman para maniwala na oo, may PAG-ASA ako. e putang ina mo rin eh. oo tama, putang ina ka talaga!! as in, fuck the hell. madami pa akong gustong sabihin sayo, kung alam mo lang. ano, ano ba talaga? paaasahin mo lang ba ako? shut up!!!!

kung ayaw mo sakin, sabihin mo. kung gusto mo, sabihin mo. wag kang tulala.

Labels: love, love love, love love love